newsletter

i just wrote this to (possibly) be included in the next GSV newsletter. I must admit, I have a pretty cool life :)

After completing her GSV year in August, Madeline moved to Montréal, Québec, to earn her Masters degree in social work from McGill University. This summer she plans to complete a practical thesis project based in New York City. She will be meeting with various non-profit and governmental organizations to complete a needs-assessment addressing services for commercially sexually exploited youth throughout the city. This research, along with her other work surrounding child sexual abuse, were heavily influenced by her experiences in working with the residents at Marian Hall. Currently, Madeline is also an intern at IBCR (International Bureau for Children's Rights) in Montréal where she is completing a comprehensive review of child protection training materials for military forces prepairing for deployment as UN peacekeepers (or "Blue Helmets") around the world. She will be traveling to Italy this March to present her work at a UN Department of Peacekeeping Operations conference. She looks forward to graduating in August and returning to New York to begin her career.

another beginning

Today was my first day back at work after vacation. I started on the right foot by going to TWO classes at the gym, and then came home to Pad Thai, beer scotch, shisha, insnece, and oreos.

My grades are in for last semester. 3.8. Not bad. Not bad at all. My last ever first day of school is tomorrow, and I am so excited!!!

2011 est fin.

January: An AWESOME New Year’s Eve out in NYC.

                Depression, thought about quitting GSV, therapy.

                Grad school applications.

February: Retreat in Wikitunk, Super Bowl party.

                Recovery from depression.

                Birthday fun. 

March: Miami.

            Accepted to McGill and Hunter.

            Community silliness.

April: McGill visit.

          Scranton weekend.

          Discovered Rachel Lloyd / GEMS.

May: Resumed exploring NYC.

         Silent retreat.

         Charles got fired.

Annie moved to LA.

Becoming comfortable with “God.”

Signed up for French lessons.

June: Killer heat wave.

                Sarah’s wedding.

                Anxiety about next year.

                TCI training.

                Jess’ cabin.

                SCAVENGER HUNT!

July: Alaska.

                Deep thoughts about leaving GSV/NYC.

                Gay marriage legalized in New York State.

                Last day at Marian Hall.

                Going away parties.

                Re-O.

August: Surf lessons in VA.

                Going away party for Paraguayans.

                Canadian visa approved.

                More McGill anxiety.

                New GSV orientation, saying goodbye to my former roommates
                 (and crying til Brooklyn).

                Moved to Montréal.

September: Car broken into.

                Lack-of-internship anxiety.

                Exploring Montréal.

                Cultural and language struggles.

                Parents “adopted” a new dog.

October: Midterms.

                New friends.

                Started interning at IBCR.

                Homesick for GSV and NYC.

                6 year anniversary with Dave.

                                       

November: Overworked with classes and internship. Dissatisfied with the organizational culture at

my internship.

Planning my research of commercially sexually exploited youth in the justice system. Getting really excited and motivated by the awesomeness of McGill.

             Making friends at my internship.

            Thanksgiving/family reunion in D.C.

December: Offered research opportunity within Montréal from McGill.

                Continuing to plan my own research project in NYC and Montréal.

                The Nutcracker.

                Awesome holiday work party.

                Invited to Italy for work conference.

                Parents got rid of one of the dogs for fighting too much.

                Christmas home.

Agenda for 2012: Graduate, get a job, start paying off student debt. No sweat.

c'est la vie

yesterday:
-i was invited to a UN Department of Peacekeeping Operations conference for a week in Italy because of the work I've been doing at my internship
-a boy I very much dislike farted really loudly at work
-we had an awesome holiday party with good people, good food, and unlimited wine
-I got a very nice compliment from a co-worker

today:
-my car wouldn't start this morning. grand total: 2 1/2 hours of wasted time, $170 repair
-my parents had to get rid of one of our dogs

maybe tomorrow will fall somewhere in the middle.

another email excerpt

this is another excerpt from an email sent to my fabulous roommates from last year (because i didnt feel like writing it all over again)

today was also really exciting because i had a meeting with my advisor, where i learned two things. one: i knew i needed to take a summer course, but i learned today that i can do the study i sent earlier and get credit instead of taking another lecture. SO COOL. i get practical experience, i can put it on my resume, and I make my own schedule. doesnt get much better than that! funny story to go with this: i was telling my prof that i missed new york because people were real - if they dont like you they tell you, if you mess up they tell you. here, everyone smiles then talks behind your back. I told her ''as my roommate (a canadian) told me, "all canadians are tellytubbies."'' so, she said '''i know the perfect person for you! 'shes loud and gets in your face and complains and shell meddle in your work! she needs someone for a project; are you interested?" to which i said yes, of course! so there ya go. now ill be doing research for her, interviewing kids/teens in the youth justice/youth protection system =] (details about the project below)

in other awesome news, i think i mentioned to you guys that I had designed this grant proposal? well, to make it short I designed a proposal for a grant ($30,000!) and then found out i cant get it because im not canadian. but i thought it was a good idea and i didnt want to give up on it, and today i got (tentative) approval to use my idea as my isp!!!! isp is independent study project, which can either be a thesis (as i had planned on doing) or a practical (which I will now do). the project is basically a lit review and then needs assessment of the existing best practices and current practices used for teens/youth who are pressing charges against people who have molested or sexually exploited them. it was 100% inspired by stories from marian hall and other disturbing news stories of cops raping kids. and of course law and order svu. =x SO ill be submitting a formal proposal in march and hopefully conducting research in nyc this summer!!!! i plan to interview people at 17th street and a few other organizations ill be researching. i am SO excited =]]]]]

besides school news, my internship is getting better. i made a solid friendship with one girl and casual friends with the others, and i finally got an interesting assignment. im now doing data analysis of military training documents from armies around the world to see how they train soldiers on youth protection. its cool stuff, but really sad to see that about 50% is dedicated to telling troops not to/ to stop raping civilians and children. did you know that one of the best indicators to measure the growth in prostitution and sexual exploitation in a poor country is the presence of peacekeeping troops? disgusting. but, im glad to finally be doing meaningful and stimulating work with a purpose =]

aside from spewing about my nerdy interests, life is good =] i went to DC for thanksgiving to see my entire extended family. it was not said, but everyone went with the assumption that itll be the last time were all together before my grandpa dies. i had a good time and was really happy i was able to go, but i think you always forget how warped and crazy your family is until you see them all in one (dry!) place. yikes. luckily, im still young enough that i can spend most of my time playing monopoly with my cousins =]


details about my practical course:

The Writers in the Community (WIC) program is jointly run by the Quebec Writers’ Federation (QWF), and The Centre for Literacy. The WIC program, started in 2003, is designed to expose marginalized teenagers and youth who have been left out of the artistic and social mainstreams to writers who present them with opportunities from the literary arts. The WIC program pays a writer-facilitator to go into schools and youth-based community organizations to facilitate writing groups for eight sessions and selects two locations a year. Each group normally consists of 5-10 participants, most of whom are under the age of 18.

 

 

These two organizations are interested in collaborating with the McGill School of social work to carry out a program evaluation of the WIC program. This evaluation would focus on interviewing the youth who have participated in the program. As the QWF/Centre for Literacy work in partnership with Batshaw Youth and Family Centres (BYFC), a research submission application to the BYFC ethics committee is required in order to proceed. It is hoped that approximately 15-20 youth would be interviewed.

On a mission

McGill is offering a funding for a fellowship that looks awesome. It's up to $30,000 to do any project anywhere in the world. The stipulations are that it needs to address a need expressed by the community, be realistic, and be sustainable. Pretty easy, right?

That's why I decided to go for it. Usually I don't even read those types of emails, figuring they aren't available to me or that me/my ideas would be good enough anyway so why bother? But getting into McGill and doing pretty well here has boosted my ego, so I got all excited about it, drafted a basic plan, and started mentioning it to my contacts to see what came back. The response was positive, so I felt good. I've been really excited about it and thinking about it a lot, and I enjoy thinking about it and planning it.

I went to an info session about the grant today to check out the competition, and I am so disappointed. One of the criteria I had somehow overlooked is that you need to be a Canadian citizen or permanent resident. HOW DID I MISS THAT?!??!$ At first I was crushed. Now, though, I don't care. I have a good idea, the experience and credentials needed to back it up, and I'm going to try and do it anyway. I'm going to continue reaching out to my contacts, try to make new ones, and look for alternate sources of funding. I'm on a mission!

daycare

A few weeks ago I was really excited. I got the internship I had wanted since I first heard about it back in New York. I went in, optimistic and ready to learn, only to be stopped in my tracks. Now, only a few weeks later, I greedily log my hours, knowing that every hour I write down is one less I need to complete. One less day I need to go back.

I've made a few friends and my supervisor is nice. The one above her, not so much, but there’s nothing I can do about that. Also, my job is interesting on paper. Why is it, then, that I feel like I go to adult daycare every day?          

                        Don’t be late! Even five minutes will earn you a reprimand.

Don’t talk! Even though our office is set up in desk clusters according to project so you can talk to your coworkers.

Don’t take breaks! I’m allowing myself some leeway here, but the consensus among the other interns is that internet breaks are trouble. No facebook, no gmail, not even for five minutes an hour.

So what do you do to give your brain a break, I asked them. Apparently they water the plants, do their dishes, make coffee.. yanno, more work. To take a break from work.

Is there something I’m missing here? I know I come here to work and that it is a job. But really, I feel like I come here and keep my head down for nine hours a day to do nothing. My assignments are not important, and they are few and far between. Right now I’m almost done with something not due for another week and a half, so I do a bit every day but spend time doing homework whenever possible. I’m not growing here. I’m not learning much except that working in an office sucks and maybe I was wrong when I thought this is what I wanted to do with my life. Who could stand to do this every day until they’re 65?!

I just need to pull through for another 3.5 months and get on with my life.